Theres a black rain cloud hanging over my head...

I have been in the foulest mood today - dunno why... but I made myself stay in the bedroom away from the kids most of the afternoon so i didnt snap at them for no reason.

Wish i could pinpoint the reasons for these bad moods though

Anyhoo - we got word from the Kindy that Cheeky has got a place now, we went to get the paperwork this afternoon and he starts next Tuesday! He is soooo excited but me is sad - what will I do for 10 hours all by myself every week? OMG I cant be just me - Im a mummy not a real person!

*sniff*

I start my Pilates course tomorrow - I am soo excited!! I have always wanted to do it.... I will prob be so sore but heck you only live/die once lol

Got a busy weekend - but I will do my best to get on and talk to you bloggie

sweet dreams xoxox

Happy Valentines Day! xoxoxoxo

Massive mind blank there... I was trying to think of a title - so i went for the corny Valentines one!!

So its been another 3 days since i blogged......... tsk tsk

Its been busy but mostly boring....... except for last night :)

DH went to see "Priscilla the musical" www.priscillathemusical.com at The Regent Theatre in Melbourne.

I had bought tickets for DH for his birthday last month... he has always been a big Priscilla Queen of the Dessert fan!

What can I say about it? IT WAS AWESOME - we laughed and danced and laughed

We sat 8 rows from the front - could not have picked a more perfect spot!

I got showered in confetti and popped on the head by a ping pong ball. I also had one of the cast make a beeline for me and try get me upon stage NOOOOOOOOOOOO WAY!

I so wish I had the 'balls' so to speak to do things like that - but all I could think was OMG NO I AM WAY TO FAT - I felt like everyone in the theatre would be looking at me and think "Lay off the McDonalds woman"

Anyway, it was an awesome night and worth every penny - I just wish I could afford to take the kids - they would just love it.

Today I took The Actress and Ms Sarcasm to the Dentist - both will need braces ($$$$$$$$) but they are not urgent. So now we need x-rays etc and then we can get some costings and see where we can go from there.

Money money money

I am sooooooooooooooo sick of paying out money!!!!!!!!!!!!

I didnt get a menu plan done this week - need to do it but have so much else to get done - need to get the Football notes out for registration day next week, get more listed on ebay, catch up on housework and much much more

A mummies work is never done
xoxo

OH I got flowers today from DH - he also gave each of the 3 girls a sngle red rose - so so sweet

And the worst mother award goes to..........

ME!

I WON I WON I WON

Oh... lets see........... Id like to thank...............

Oh hang on this isnt a GOOD thing....

I feel like sh*t

Sporty came up to me bout a month ago saying he had hurt his thumb at school - wrestling or some foolin around with his mates

I got him to move it, which he could no worries, so I said it aint broken so jut be careful and we will see how it goes.

A week later he mentions casually that its still feeling 'uncomfortable'

Mother (thats me) tells him he has prob bruised it - "You'll be right mate!"

2 weeks forward and in passing he asks "is it normal that it still hurts????"

Crap - ok I will get you to the docs mate and get it checked out

A few days later dh takes him off to docs

Doc says it looks fine but lets Xray just in case

Tonight we go back......................

Broken!

Well 'fractured' in medical terms - just a very little chip - the doc assures me

I wanted the ground to swallow me up then and there - I felt SO BAD

BAD BAD BAD EVIL MOTHER

Poor sporty - I hugged him and apologised - over and over and over - all the way home

SO NOW he has been diagnosed he has to wear a thumb/wrist splint for 3-4 weeks so it can get a chance to heal

Pity we are SO broke that he has to wait till thursday (payday) so we can afford the $29.95 for the splint (Geeez I am not doing very well this week eh)

So thats been my afternoon - need to sit down now and do my menu plan monday now (Thanks Ann for your nagging so I dont forget)

As always - me be back xoxo

Sorry...........

Im sorry little bloggie - i have been neglecting you again :o(

I have re-opened my ebay account and have spent the past couple of days listing furiously. We so need the money or my 'get out of debt' plan wont get off the ground.

So my nice clean house looks like a messy shop once more - thats ONE thing that I didnt miss since I stopped ebaying! I wish so much I could just have a room to do all this in - somewhere I didnt have to worry about stuff being everywhere. I get so embarrassed when someone pops over and sees the house like this..... so the choice is clean house or money!

I really need to brainstorm a better way to organise it all I think

Not much else to report, we have 9 kids in the house tonight, and apart from the TV being up full volume and someones music blaring from one of the bedrooms its not that bad.

I need/want/am begging for a bigger house...........

I can only dream

I will be back tomorrow xoxoxoxo

The 'D' word

Ive been sitting here watching telly for the past 40 mins and gone through 4 chicken strips (cold, leftovers from previous meal), a piece of choc cake, and 2 small chocolate bars.....

Washed down with water (The ONLY thing I am proud of!)

What a piggy

No wonder me is fatty boombah

So tomorrow I have decided I am going to start a food diary!

I cant promise I will eat healthier but I am hoping it will make me more accountable and perhaps be the first step to a better diet.

One can only dream eh

I will report back tomorrow and let you know how I am going with it

Oh and btw it was D for Diet lol

Night (again) xoxo

Oh my aching body.....

Gawd I hate the Gym

Well actually I dont - I just hate being so unfit that a simple workout darn near kills me!!

The good news is I have lost 2.5 kilos (5.5lbs I think) in the past month, the bad news is I cant see where I lost it from and i have every confidence that i will find it again soon LOL

The menu planning has taken a little of the stress away - I made the meat pie today, well I actually decided to make mini individual pies to make dishing up dinner a lil easier.

The Actress was at work, the youngest two wanted fish fingers but wow all 4 of the other kids LOVED the pie! So did DH - he even finished mine off cos I couldnt finish it (It WAS yummy tho)

So theres another meal I can add to the 'make again' list!

It was a busy day here today, had a friend from the football club come by so we could work on some more details for getting this season underway and DH had his mate finally show up to do some yard work on his mini excavator. I must say just a couple hours of work and the yard looks SOOO much neater and nicer. We even threw some grass seed down so fingers crossed the birds dont eat it all and we get some grass soon!

Other than that I took Sporty and Drama Queen to the Dentist - both got told off for not brushing often enough - I felt like an irresponsible parent but there is only so much nagging you can do right? Cheeky has a dental appointment tomorrow afternoon about his 'Ouchy Mouth' - hopefully we can make that stop hurting for him... my poor lil man.

I was so excited to come online tonight and see all the lovely messages people have left for me in regards to my menu plan - there are so many nice people out here in bloggie land - If any of you are reading this - THANK YOU SO MUCH xoxo I intend to go and visit each and every one of your websites (I love blog visitig lol)

I need to go have a hot shower and curl up on the couch I think - my legs are KILLING me lol (Someone please tell me this will get easier hehe)

Cya xoxoxo

My first ever Menu Plan Monday

Monday: Spaghetti and Meatballs (Something very quick and easy as we have a football club meeting tonight)

Tuesday: Home made Meat pie, Potato patties and mixed vegetables

Wednesday: Chilli Con Carne, Mashed Potato (Chicken for the fussy girls)

Thursday: Tacos, with rice/mince filling and plenty of salad

Friday: Sausage casserole with baked potatos and mixed vegetables

Saturday: Lasagne and salad (Chicken again for the fussy girls)

Sunday: French country chicken and rice (Vege burgers for DH who hates chicken!)

There - my first attempt at menu planning... fingers crossed we stick to it! The best bit is that we have EVERYTHING we need here already so no excuses.

I havent bothered with dessert planning, some nights we have dessert, some we cant be
bothered :o)

Special thanks to Laura at www.orgjunkie.com for having such easy to use instructions on her website to make it so easy for twits like me to join in on this great idea (I hope I did everything right!)

xoxoxo

Grocery shop........

Yay we went grocery shopping today - its been like FOREVER since we did a proper shop.

We must have spent a fortune going to the shops every day to find something for dinner that night........ so to aid our new budget/get out of debt plan I put my foot down and demanded (asked - pleaded - begged) DH to go shopping with me this morning.

I EVEN planned a menu for the next 2 weeks AND made a shopping list AFTER checking our pantry and fridge/freezer! WOW Man I am GOOD hehe

Anyway the best bit?

We spent ONLY $280 All up - for 2 weeks worth of food for all 9 of us! (I say ONLY cos we were spending $30-$50 each trip to the store and we were going daily!)

This amount is all fruits and vege, meats and grocery and cleaning items - even catfood!!

I am soooo proud of us (espec myself lol)

I will need to go get milk and bread each 2 days but I will get DH to pick that up and only give him enough money to buy those items alone - he is better disciplined than i am in that respect. (Let him loose in a hardware store and thats a different matter!)

So now I am just going to finalise what meals we will have this week and then i might even be very brave and try link it to Lauras Menu Plan Monday (www.orgjunkie.com)

Wish me luck!!

xoxo

Busy little bees...

Its been a busy busy day here, although i still didnt get as much done as I was planning/hoping/wanting to. (I am my own worst critic)

I guess the fact that DH and I didnt roll out of bed till half past ten wasnt exactly a roaring start LOL

But the bed was soooo warm and comfy :o)

I did manage to find the dining table again (It WAS under that big pile of crap in the middle of the dining room like I guessed)

We loaded heaps more stuff into the trailer ready for the tip run tomorrow and the pile out the back ready to take to the charity shop is getting bigger by the minute.

We bought a small cupboard from The Reject shop to serve as a games cupboard and The Actress kindly went through all our board games and worked out which ones were complete - we threw the incomplete ones away. That in itself was a major achievement for me as normally i would have kept them - yep you guessed it - just in case!

Tomorrow I need to do our bedroom - I cheated a little today and put piles of stuff in there that I just couldnt decide what to do with - so I need to work some more storage solutions out I think.

DH's mate should be here tomorrow with his dingo mini excavater and I am sooo excited to see something being done around the yard. I just wish we had stacks more money so we could get it all fixed up nice. I know it upsets DH a LOT that we have been in the house for 4 1/4 years and the place still looks like it does.

Tomorrow I also want to do a menu plan, do some grocery shopping, start eating healthy, get my budget up and running properly and continue with the housecleaning.

I have an appt to go back to the gym tomorrow afternoon - that is SO gonna KILL me but I know I need to do it.

Well its getting late so I will say goodnight and hopefully have good news to report tomorrow (as in YAY I got off my butt and actually did some things on my to do list!!)

Night lil bloggie xoxox

They want more WHAT??

The following is a true story lol

Over the summer months the majority of our meals are light and very casual. Sandwiches are very common as are BBQ'd meat and salad. Sometimes we have cold meats (Ham, Devon etc) with salad or even just toasted sandwiches (jaffles)........ all in all anything that requires little cooking and is easy and quick to put together.

This summer has been no different....... until tonight........ DH is at work and I was TRYING to get our room cleaned up so I just popped some chicken tenders (strips) and fish fingers in the oven and got totally lazy and decided to go get some hot chips from the takeaway shop to go with them. (Bad bad mummy)

So I dish up the kids dinners.......... they come a'runnin........

They stop.............

and look...........

A collective "oh"

Me: Wassup? You guys not hungry?

The Actress "Oh its ok, I was just hoping for veges with it"

Sporty "Yeh me too"

Ms Sarcasm: "At least some Peas..."

Drama Queen: "And some Brocolli and Beans..."

WHAT THE?????

Oh talk about making mum feel 2" tall!

My children are asking me where their veges are - NO ONE warned me about this...... in fact no one I know has ever been faced with this problem.

Me: "Umm sorry kids - we will have veges tomorrow - I promise"

So I spoke to DH on his dinner break at work and told him about my parental failures........ he laughed and said we will have to make sure they get their vege fix over the next couple of weeks.

They say that the apple doesnt usually fall far from the tree........ but remembering my anti-vege days as a young girl........... these apples have rolled all the way into the next field!

Oh well - guess I cant complain lol

(But I think I just did!!)

More news on the house make-over - DH offered to take me to IKEA tomorrow and I was soooo excited but then I remembered that The Actress has to work from 12-4pm so there goes that idea. He also told me he has arranged for a mate from work to come by on Monday with his Mini Dingo Excavator to FINALLY level out the dirt in our back yard and hopefully do something with the front yard........... My first thought was OMG I have just tomorrow to clean the house before he comes by. (I hate people seeing our home for the first time in a big mess!)

SO I better snuggle down and get some rest - BIG day tomorrow

Night night my lil bloggie
xoxoxox

Moody B*tch

Am I allowed to say that word here?

My blog so I say I can................

Who am I talking about? Why its ME!

Last night cheeky climbed into our bed and I tossed and turned for a while and thought if I stay here I am not getting ANY sleep tonight so I got up and went out to the boys room. There was no way I was climbing up into Cheekys bed (Top Bunk) - I had visions of it collapsing under my weight and poor Skinny Boy would be squashed. So I climbed into the bottom bunk with Skinny Boy and tried to go to sleep.

Problem was - we were at opposite ends of the bed so I ended up being half awake all night trying to make sure I didnt kick him in the head or squash his little legs.

So after all that I got stuff all sleep anyway...................... and man I woke up G R U M P Y !

I had so many plans for today, things I wanted to get done before DH went to work at 1.30pm... NONE of it was done - or even started.

Poor DH - he is so sweet.... he laid next to me on the bed and tried to cuddle me and cheer me up and all I could do was cry and glare at him.

I felt all "stereotypical" woman........... You know the drill........

DH "Whats the matter honey?"

ME "NOTHING!"

DH "So cheer up baby"

ME "I CANT, Im too UPSET!!!"

DH "So there must be something wrong. Tell me, what is it?"

ME "I dont KNOW!!!"

DH "Tell me what I can do to fix it and make you happy then"

ME "Oh you just DONT UNDERSTAND!!"

Poor guy lol

Looking back its almost comical... but the truth is I just felt so overwhelmed and I prob couldnt tell anyone exactly what was wrong. He asked me if he did anything wrong........ and I couldnt think of anything he had done or said that upset me........ yet I was feeling mad as heck at him...... Wheres the logic?

I feel so frustrated at the state of the house, that my get out of debt plan is not coming along as quick as I would like, I feel annoyed and frustrated at my weight........

And so I take it out on DH...................... Womans logic! Go Figure!

He starts holidays tomorrow for 2 weeks, he has worked the last 2 1/2 weeks straight so that may have something to do with it...... I am just telling myself to have a rest today (a rest from doing nothing - thats funny) and we can get stuck into the house and everything else over the next 2 weeks....

Sorry my little blog, I had to rant and rave and get those feelings out - maybe I can come back this afternoon and be much more positive and happy.....

bbl xoxoxo

Who trashed my house?

Okay 'fess up'

Who done it?

My house looks like a bomb has hit it and i want an explanation!

I'm not fooling you am I........

Ok..... twas me..........

I have been re-organising

Well TRYING to :o)

I went and bought some tubs today at Big W and a $2 store and came home and got stuck in....

They are not the ones I REALLY WANTED but there are two reasons for that;

1. I wanted IKEA ( I LURVE IKEA) but IKEA is over an hours drive away
2. I couldnt afford anything better

I paid $2-$4 each for these ones so not too bad and they will do for now (famous last words)

The problem is I have pulled everything out of my linen cupboard and organised half of it......... then I started on our large Welsh Dresser........ pulled it all out and havent got far with that one either.......... then I started pulling everything off the bookshelves in the computer area........... can you see a pattern here? Yep thats right........ Im a 'starter' but I dont finish things before I start the next one LOL

Tsk Tsk - Im terrble!

But I promise over the next few days I will have it all cleaned up and take pictures to show you

Pressures on now........

Talk soon xxooxo

BUT HE IS TOO LITTLE..............

*sniff*

Its been a hard day............

Its been an emotional day......

One of my 'babies' started school today...... my second youngest.... my little skinny boy

He keeps telling me "Im a big boy now mummy"

*sniff* I know you are sweetheart

................... b b b but your still my baby (more mummy tears)

Daddy made sure he was on afternoon shift this week so he could be there to take him everyday.... then brave daddy took the camera off mummy and took all the photos (mummy thinks its so no one could see daddies tears.....)

He looked sooooo adorable in his school uniform - it looked miles to big for him... the smallest size they had was a 6 ... a 4 would have been so much better. Well he will grow im sure lol

Anyway - he loved it, loves his teacher, made some new friends (but cant remember their names yet) and got a big kick out of seeing the Drama Queen in the playground at lunch time!

Poor Cheeky was devastated that his playmate went off to school without him - hopefully we can get him into a kindy (pre school) soon

Then I will be ALL alone (LOTS MORE MUMMY TEARS)

I missed you........

I feel so bad my little blog for not writing in you last night - Im so sorry.

I wish I could say it wont happen again but I am more honest than that and I fear it will LOL

Anyway, yesterday I felt like I was in and out the car all day - Mums taxi - thats me!

Thats my excuse for not writing - and Im sticking to it!

I will be back............. (thats your cue to run and hide.......)

xoxo

By tomorrow i meant TOMORROW...

Remember yest when i said tomorrow I will actually do some stuff around here instead of reading blogs all day?
Well By tomorrow I meant tomorrows tomorrow!

Yep you guessed it - i got nuffin done again today - bad bad mummy.... bad bad housewife!

DH was supposed to have the day off but seeing as its a public holiday he volunteered to work - he gets double time or triple time or somewhat - so its a good thing money wise but I feel like its been forever since he had a day off!

I actually thought about turning away from the computer long enough to write myself a list of what I want to get done/achieve - something to mark off as i go - something to inspire me........

I havent done it yet!

Ive been reading so many blogs today and learnt a lot.
I didnt realise some people could be so nasty when leaving comments on peoples blogs - I was shocked! I always thought a blog is just your personal opinion - yet people get attacked for saying how they feel. Its rather sad and I would be just heartbroken if someone ever did that to me.... fingers crossed.

Some peoples blogs are very witty and fun to read, others get very political or heavy - very deep and meaningful - a little too deep for me.

I actually like reading about peoples lives, the good and not so good times. About raising their families, coping with personal and relationship issues, getting back on their feet financially.

But I guess thats the beauty of Blogs isnt it - that we are all different and there are blogs out there that are sure to appeal to all of us.

Some people have 'followers' too - regular readers of their blogs - that amazes me to no end..... I know that this is not something that will ever happen to me, im not witty, funny or interesting enough........... but what a kick you'd get out of that eh?

Nice to dream......

Night Night my little blog xoxo

Wasted

Hmmm interesting title eh?

I wish I could say Ive been getting stuck into the wine and had a fantastic day and now I am totally 'wasted' ..................... but alas.............

Nope............ Wasted............. its how I feel about today.

Darn Blogs........... Ive spent the whole day being emersed in other peoples lives via their blogs that i have acheieved and done absolutely NUFFIN.

Ann tells me reading blogs is addictive............. WELL DUH! You could have told me that BEFORE you got me hooked.

My home used to be spotless - like a showhome..... until I started blogging........

Okay now I am just full of crap hehe

Maybe I should have titled this entry TOMORROW........... cos tomorrow I will actually do some stuff around here.......... the sun will come out tommooorrroooowwwww

Yeh and piggys may fly. :o)

Today wasnt a TOTAL waste though - I did make cookies YUM

Skinny Boy loves to help me - he is so cute as he rolls little bits of cookie mix between his hands (he has had lots of experience with play doh)

He also is rather heavy handed with the Chocolate Chips.......... DH at one point asked if we liked cookie dough with our choc chips!! The only thing skinny boy wont do it actually eat the cookies - he doesnt eat chocolate (I KNOW - WEIRD!!) (AND YES HE IS MY KID)

Skinny Boy concentrating on rolling the cookie dough 'just right'

Each cookie needs a ratio of 80% choc chips to 20% dough

MMMMMM Cookies in the oven - get those glasses of milk ready

(It is also quite embarrassingly apparent I need to clean my oven lol)

Im a mover...

Ive worked it out......... i dont clean or declutter - I MOVE things.

Phew! Glad i got THAT off my chest........ felt like I should have been in confessional.

I have always known I am a hoarder - Dh has told me that often enough.... but over the past few weeks I have been 'sorting' thru stuff and thinking back not a lot actually got turfed.

I just went through 3 drawers stuffed with paperwork - determined to purge purge purge.....

I ended up with a small pile to toss, a pile to redirect to my current files in my filing cabinet........... and.............

3 drawers of filing!

What the???????????

How does that work? I got NOWHERE!!

And another thing - I believe that stuff multiplies all by itself in my house

Every 4-5 months we go right through our garage and end up taking 1-2 trailer loads to the tip and a car full to the charity shop..........

Yet within 2 months.............. ITS BAAAACCCCCKKKK!

AND its brought many new friends....

Where the heck does it all come from?

I soooo want to declutter this place, I want to be FREE FREE FREE

I want one of those sparse clean clutter free homes like in the magazines

Im dreaming arnt i :o(

I think my biggest problem/fear is that I will get rid of something and then regret it later.....

Or I get too caught up in the money side of things........

But I could sell that on ebay............... (WHEN??? I prob never will)

I might have a garage sale?................ (Again.... WHEN???)

I could fix it and use it? ................. (Now who is kidding who?)

I paid good money for that.............. (ok so you wasted your money, its done ... get OVER it)

I might need it one day.............. (Yes you might... but big chances are you wont)

I go nuts at the kids for the crap they keep yet i am JUST as bad if not WORSE

If you took a look in my wardrobe for example you would find 3 crates and 6 boxes of clothes......

My skinny me clothes

I try tell myself that i will need them fr when I lose this weight........

I also try talk myself into throwing them away - they will prob be out of date by the time I get skinny again

I just cant do it...............

I try convince myself that I will feel lighter, free-er, that a big load will lift if I purge it all......

but what if I dont.... what if I regret it? man I am pathetic

So I sit in my cluttered house - feeling like I cant even breathe somedays..........

Before Christmas last year I got tired of the mess in our lounge/study area - I was so sick of my desk/craft table looking like a bomb had hit it. My desk was the butt of the families messy jokes. So I cracked..........
I went and bought a small computer desk........ big enough for the computer and thats all.
I came home, packed ALL my craft and scrapbooking stuff in boxes and shoved them out into the garage.
I got DH to take the monster table out and put the new smaller computer desk in.

It looks soooo much neater, tidier etc now, just a quick wipe every few days and a sweep of the floor and that part of the room has never been so tidy.

BUT now I miss my craft *sniff*

I cant win. I want to go rescue all my nice papers and embellishments from the garage but where would I put them? I have a scrapbook storage tower I picked up on sale but it wont hold even 1/8th of what I have..........

Mebe if I purged mycrapbook supplies I could just keep the best bits........ but then what would I do with the rest? I cant throw it away, I wouldnt want to just give it away......... I paid good money for that........ what if i regret it later? HERE I GO AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hmmmmmmmmm think I might have to troll the internet for inspiration.............

me be back............
xoxo

Cheeky being serious

A rare photo of Cheeky - rare in that he is clean and not wearing his big cheeky smile

I love it though

Taken Jan 15th 2008 during a family day out

Take two.........

Okay two posts on one night? lets not make a habit of this eh

I just couldnt go to bed and leave my poor little blog with all that negativity........

So I thought i would do a little rerun of my day to end the evening

Hmmmmmmmm

Now I wish we had dome something exciting lol

Today was my niece's last full day here - she has been here for almost 2 weeks and flies back home tomorrow. Poor girl does not want to go home and we have really enjoyed having her here too. The Actress had to work today from 8am till 3pm so my niece watched Buffy dvds with the Drama Queen.

I woke Dh up at 3pm (I hate when he is on midnights) and after i picked The Actress up from work the kids all decided they wanted to go hang out at the shops and go to Maccas for dinner.

DH dropped them all off (Bar the little 2) and then surprised me by bringing home come chinese for our dinner and chips for the little 2. (Very healthy eh)

The girls rang to be picked up from the shops a couple of hours later but the boys decided to stay down there. Sporty ran into his gf and her brother and they stayed down there with them. The gf's mum dropped them home later.

So in all it was a quiet evening........ nothing romantic........ even when skinny boy and cheeky both fell asleep and it was just the two of us.... well lets just say neither of us could be bothered getting off our couches to get romantic ...... talk about an old couple!!!!!!!!!

The Actress has been really moody tonight - I have tried talking to her but cant get a straight answer as to why........ maybe once her cousin has gone home tomorrow we can have a proper chat. Im so thankful that my kids still come to me when they are upset.... Id be devastated to lose that communication with them.

Only funny thing i can think of that happened today was a conversation with cheeky.

I was readng a blog online and he was laying beside me on the bed chattering away. Being the terrible mother I am I was only half listening.

I thought he said he was a train.

Mum: Oh your a train are you baby?

Cheeky: NO MUMMY I not a train........... SEE! I has ears and legs and tummy and wee wee and bum and eyes and nose and hands and feets and cheeks......... TRAINS DONT HAVE THEMS

slight pause

Cheeky: (half under his breath) silly mummy!

He makes me laugh so much - he comes out with the cutest things....... and you just had to be there to see his expressions.......... like mums totally lost it calling me a train!

No matter how sad i feel or what kind of day i have had that boy can cheer me up in an instant.

Gosh i love my kids.................

most of the time *wink*

catcha xoxo

Me Sad

That was my text message to Dh just now



Me Sad



Poor guy is at work, doing a midnight shift.... prob working his cute butt off to make money for us and thats my encouraging text message to him



Me Sad



I dont know what I expect the man to do about it. Perhaps race home, grabbing wine and chocolates on the way, and coming home to wrap me in his arms and make everything better.



I wish!



So WHY am I sad? Dunno (typical woman eh)



Im sitting on my bed looking through blogs, eating a packet of chips - well 2 packets if I am honest........... BUT they are the small snack sized ones (that makes it better doesnt it?)



BUT BUT BUT I am drinking water too - doesnt the water rule out the fat in the chips?



I feel fat! (Theres logic there somewhere - feel fat so you eat junk???)



I feel bored



I feel like my life is running away without me.



Im now 35 years and 2 days in age



I thought I would be more, have more and have done more at this age



I know 35 isnt really that old - I keep reminding myself that some people are only just starting their families at this age.............



The weird thing is I dont feel 35 in some ways yet I feel so much older in other ways.



Now I am confusing myself.



My body feels like its 80. Im so tired all the time, I feel so uncordinated, Im sure if I tried to dance id look terribly drunk. No matter how long i sleep I wake up feeling like ive been on an all night bender. No matter if I eat crap or go for the lean meat and salad i feel bloated and sick afterwards. Sometimes I feel like my body is just giving up on me.



Yet in my head i think I am about 15....... i dont feel old enough to have kids, never mind a 15 yr old! My daughter starts year 11 next week..... HEY I HAVENT EVEN BEEN IN YEAR 11 YET!!



Sometimes I will be at the shops or movies and see young guys (early 20's) and I think oh he's cute and then when they look straight through me I will realise they prob look at me and see 'some old lady'......... sometimes it shocks me to remember I am not some young chick anymore. Hmm does this make me sound like some sick old bird who chases young men? Geeezz Thanks Ann for suggesting a blog - Im going to get arrested now!!



What happened?



And then I look at the magazines etc and see stars around my own age and holy crap I feel like I could pass for their mothers! yes yes I know they have all those stylists, nutritionists etc...... but c'mon...... oh I just feel so ripped off!



I was looking through some blogs today and came across this blog..... I had to reboot so I dont remember the name of it........



But it was a young family, Mom (American ok), dad, 2 girls and a boy



All gorgeous - even mom - she was young slim and so pretty



They had photos of their house (O M G talk about beautiful)



They had photos of the kids, all looked like little angels, doing the whole pumpkin carving thing, their family photo/christmas card, going to the tree farm to chop down their tree, which was later erected in their perfect living room and decorated like something out of a department store.



This ladies blog was almost sickening, everything sounded so perfect - and to top it off she had this massive list down one side of links to allthe other bloggers in her family..... sisters, sister in laws, cousins etc



And everyone of them was just as gorgeous and perfect......



Man i could have cried



Actually I did



Pathetic eh. Its like everything I dreamt of as a child........ I didnt know some people actually lived like that. That sucks man!



Im sure they have disagreements, and surely the kids have tantrums and get sick and vomit through those pretty bedrooms and stuff............. but oh man.......



Imagine not having to rush around and clear a space for the visitors who just called to say they are popping in.......



Imagine actually being proud of your home and not deadly ashamed of the mess and mismatched furniture....



Imagine waking up in a lovely room and getting dressed in nice clothes (and fitting into a nice small size wouldnt hurt either)



Heck i recon even cleaning would be nicer........



Im feeling very ingrateful right now



I want to delete all of this and just type something sweet and maybe funny but thats not what I wanted to do this for.... i want to be honest.... if the truth is funny then great, if its me going thru a bad moment then thats ok too.

Ok thats my whinge for now..... I need to go check on all of the kids - make sure they are not trashing everything... yes they should be in bed but hey its school holidays......

I will be back..............

Okay - everyone starts somewhere right?

Here goes......

My first post in my brand new blog TA DAAAAA!

Is that long enough? whats the accepted amount of writing in each post?

How about I start with how and why I have started this blog.....

One word for you................ ANN!

Yes my buddy Ann - it is now down in black and white that this is all her doing and her idea so if this all goes pear shaped I can blame her and she will owe me forever... on the other side if it goes wonderfully well I am sure she will insist I send her chocolate :)

Ive been curious about blogs for a long time - have often thought about starting one but then wonder to my self what I would write about and why anyone at all would want to read about my life.... but heck you only live once and I would hate to look back and think yeh I shoulda done that.... I have enough of those regrets already!!

So if you have somehow made a wrong left at some point in your tour of the WWW and you have landed at my blog and find yourself totally bored then I apologise in advance - and for future reference you should have taken a sharp right :)

For now this is it - I will be back.......